So now we know, Ross is the father.
And everyone else knows too, except Ross.
I can’t help but be reminded of when we found out Chandler and Monica had hooked up.
Poor Ross, always the last to know, always the first to divorce.
“The One With the Fourth Wedding (Not Ross's)”
Mondler are off on their honeymoon. To Bermuda. I really hope they don’t go missing. Not sure how I’d cope if even more of my friends ended up stuck abroad.
I wonder if they’ll get any special treatment? We told everyone we possibly could we were on our honeymoon, and didn’t get “bumped up” for a single thing! Perhaps there was another honeymoon couple in front of us, stealing all the first class seats and executive rooms ahead of us? Let’s be honest, if there was, it was probably Ross.
Chanica have left Joey and Phoebe home alone.
I can’t help but be reminded of when we found out Chandler and Monica had hooked up.
Poor Ross, always the last to know, always the first to divorce.
“The One With the Fourth Wedding (Not Ross's)”
Mondler are off on their honeymoon. To Bermuda. I really hope they don’t go missing. Not sure how I’d cope if even more of my friends ended up stuck abroad.
I wonder if they’ll get any special treatment? We told everyone we possibly could we were on our honeymoon, and didn’t get “bumped up” for a single thing! Perhaps there was another honeymoon couple in front of us, stealing all the first class seats and executive rooms ahead of us? Let’s be honest, if there was, it was probably Ross.
Chanica have left Joey and Phoebe home alone.
A bit like leaving a five year old with a box of matches. Sure enough, Joey immediately puts the moves on Phoebe. But she shoots him down like Cersei Lannister dealing with Jamie when she has better things to do. (Boo!)
So they turn to another discussion: “what happened to their keys to Mondler’s apartment?”
Naturally this leads to them reporting a gas leak and Mr Treeger shows up with the fire brigade.
Wait, a minute, I thought he was dead?? I’m really confused. How can he be here when he’s dead. Am I seeing ghosts? I think I need to lie down for a bit…
He makes reference to managing another apartment block that exploded. Hang on; you think he’s been dead this whole time?? Is this some sort of Sixth Sense™ situation?
Am I Bruce Willis?!
No I can’t be. I still have my hair. (Just about…)
And I wouldn’t have a chance in hell with Rachel.
If he is a ghost he’s a pretty powerful one, going to town on Chanica’s door with a fire axe. And just like that the door is split open, not unlike Rachel in eight months time. (God, I’m sorry…)
She’s gearing up to tell Ross. He’s got the wrong end of the stick, thinking she wants to get back together. It’s funny seeing him swan around thinking he’s God’s gift to women. Uh oh. I hope this isn’t what my wife see’s when I preen around looking in the mirror and talking about my hair?
Once again I’m seeing more similarities to myself and Ross than I’d care to admit. His reaction to the baby is not far off my own on discovering our second was already on the way – staring off into space for several minutes, no doubt contemplating a vasectomy.
We’re only a few weeks away from mine now. (The vasectomy, the baby was five months ago, keep up.) Hey Ross! I’ll let you know how it goes. He’s going to want to be a lot more careful now he’s found out condoms are only 99.9% effective. As will Joey.
So they turn to another discussion: “what happened to their keys to Mondler’s apartment?”
Naturally this leads to them reporting a gas leak and Mr Treeger shows up with the fire brigade.
Wait, a minute, I thought he was dead?? I’m really confused. How can he be here when he’s dead. Am I seeing ghosts? I think I need to lie down for a bit…
He makes reference to managing another apartment block that exploded. Hang on; you think he’s been dead this whole time?? Is this some sort of Sixth Sense™ situation?
Am I Bruce Willis?!
No I can’t be. I still have my hair. (Just about…)
And I wouldn’t have a chance in hell with Rachel.
If he is a ghost he’s a pretty powerful one, going to town on Chanica’s door with a fire axe. And just like that the door is split open, not unlike Rachel in eight months time. (God, I’m sorry…)
She’s gearing up to tell Ross. He’s got the wrong end of the stick, thinking she wants to get back together. It’s funny seeing him swan around thinking he’s God’s gift to women. Uh oh. I hope this isn’t what my wife see’s when I preen around looking in the mirror and talking about my hair?
Once again I’m seeing more similarities to myself and Ross than I’d care to admit. His reaction to the baby is not far off my own on discovering our second was already on the way – staring off into space for several minutes, no doubt contemplating a vasectomy.
We’re only a few weeks away from mine now. (The vasectomy, the baby was five months ago, keep up.) Hey Ross! I’ll let you know how it goes. He’s going to want to be a lot more careful now he’s found out condoms are only 99.9% effective. As will Joey.
I had a similar scare during my consultancy. Apparently there’s a 1 in 2000 chance my tubes will simply heal themselves! Rendering all the pain and swelling completely pointless.
I asked the lady if this was more likely if, like us, you seem to be more fertile than the Levant ten thousand years ago. (Little archaeology joke for you there). I thought with all the smoking and drinking my fertility would be terrible. Turns out it was a complete waste of effort. All it’s done is meant when the kids finally leave I’ll barely have any time left to enjoy myself.
But she reassured me it’s more to do with how good you are at healing your tubes. So I’m not taking any chances. Every now and then I’m gona punch my nuts and yell “don’t you guys even think of getting back together!”
You are on a break.
Now that we’ve gone through the experience twice, it’s interesting thinking of Ross’s reaction from Rachel’s perspective. I say, interesting, more like horrific. Here is a man who she was in a loving relationship with, who completely let her down, and when she needs him most he doesn’t offer her any reassurance or anything.
At least he immediately realises how insensitive he’s been, and rushes to be by her side at the first scan. Only to go too far the other way by immediately insisting they get married. Who does he think he is; Joey?!
But Rachel seems a bit happier as he helps her through the scan, pointing out the weird rabbit/peanut/lizard looking thing is their new baby. Aw, takes me right back. Now where are my boxing gloves...
Real Live Sitcom Moment:
Maybe it’s the wedding fatigue, but our fourth, and final, wedding of the year was a mixed bag.
It started early, and went on late. Normally I’d be well up for that but it’s not ideal when you have a five month old with you. There was certainly a lot to like, great food and friends, no expense spared. But there was a lot of down time for a wedding. Mercifully the baby behaved them self, as did my wife whose turn it was to drink. And the couple looked amazing!
But there’s only so much sitting around doing nothing I can take, I can get that at home. Even the ceremony itself took around two hours. Which I wouldn’t have minded, but there was only one hour of ceremony material in it. As I said to a friend, it was a bit like watching a film where they hadn’t cut out any of the bits between the scenes.
And at the end of the day this was a wedding, not Cannes Film Festival.
I asked the lady if this was more likely if, like us, you seem to be more fertile than the Levant ten thousand years ago. (Little archaeology joke for you there). I thought with all the smoking and drinking my fertility would be terrible. Turns out it was a complete waste of effort. All it’s done is meant when the kids finally leave I’ll barely have any time left to enjoy myself.
But she reassured me it’s more to do with how good you are at healing your tubes. So I’m not taking any chances. Every now and then I’m gona punch my nuts and yell “don’t you guys even think of getting back together!”
You are on a break.
Now that we’ve gone through the experience twice, it’s interesting thinking of Ross’s reaction from Rachel’s perspective. I say, interesting, more like horrific. Here is a man who she was in a loving relationship with, who completely let her down, and when she needs him most he doesn’t offer her any reassurance or anything.
At least he immediately realises how insensitive he’s been, and rushes to be by her side at the first scan. Only to go too far the other way by immediately insisting they get married. Who does he think he is; Joey?!
But Rachel seems a bit happier as he helps her through the scan, pointing out the weird rabbit/peanut/lizard looking thing is their new baby. Aw, takes me right back. Now where are my boxing gloves...
Real Live Sitcom Moment:
Maybe it’s the wedding fatigue, but our fourth, and final, wedding of the year was a mixed bag.
It started early, and went on late. Normally I’d be well up for that but it’s not ideal when you have a five month old with you. There was certainly a lot to like, great food and friends, no expense spared. But there was a lot of down time for a wedding. Mercifully the baby behaved them self, as did my wife whose turn it was to drink. And the couple looked amazing!
But there’s only so much sitting around doing nothing I can take, I can get that at home. Even the ceremony itself took around two hours. Which I wouldn’t have minded, but there was only one hour of ceremony material in it. As I said to a friend, it was a bit like watching a film where they hadn’t cut out any of the bits between the scenes.
And at the end of the day this was a wedding, not Cannes Film Festival.
