This is what you get when your dating technique consists of showing women slides of fossils.
I wouldn’t fair much better, in discussion with my wife the other day I came to the conclusion I never dated properly (the upside being I’ve also never been dumped). Have I missed out? Or was that hellish period of perpetual singledom punctuated by drunken hook-ups good enough?
It’s not so bad when we can go on dates, but it’s been a year now since we’ve done one properly!
We even did nothing for Valentine’s Day this year. Which is actually good as it’s only cropping up in Friends™ now.
We sometimes bemoan missing out on the opportunity to do dating apps. But she is getting to experience something similar. She’s got an app that is basically Tindr™ for mums. Yep! They swipe the usual way, and get hooked up with people to arrange play-dates (or trips to wine bars in the evening).
I’ve been informed there isn’t the equivalent for dads, which is for the best given I haven’t even bothered to talk to the guys in the NCT group for the last year.
I only hope she doesn’t meet a lady she likes a bit TOO much and leave me for a lesbian.
“The One With the Scared Baby”
Joey may have very strict rules when it comes to dating your friends’ sisters. But apparently they don’t apply to watching your mate’s sister in porn.
I remember all this very well; I must have seen it quite a few times. Not for the porn, which is PG at best, it must have just been on a lot. Some of these jokes are filthy for something we watched as kids though!
The attitude to sex workers is a little dated, but you can still understand Phoebe not wanting her sister doing it under her name. But spare a thought for Ursula, not only entering an industry about to be decimated by the advent of free internet porn, but also wouldn’t it suck if you were having sex and your partner kept calling out your sisters name??
It’s weird this doesn’t really get resolved isn’t it? Phoebe goes to see Ursula who refuses to stop, so Phoebe steals her pay, and that’s just the end of it? With an anticlimax like that you’d want your money back.
It is fun while it lasts. I think we can agree, if you found out one of your friends was in porn, you would watch it wouldn’t you? At least all of us Friends™ did.
The other thing happening this week was we found out Chandler can’t cry!
A bit weird, but I think something a lot of men can relate to. I think we go through phases. I remember after the quite hardening experience of school I didn’t cry for many years until my first grandfather died. Even then I was relatively numb until we arrived at his old house, a place of great familiarity from my childhood, and I snuck into his room for some quiet time only to find an empty glasses case on the side.
From then, much like Chandler, I found it a lot easier to cry at things. The floodgates were open. Films, music, you name it. I think there’s a lot of truth that if you go a bit too long without crying it can all build up and do a lot damage. Which was certainly borne out a year ago when I spent months contently pottering around my garden, determined to feel the whole world going to hell as little as possible. Before the floodgates opened.
If only I’d seen this episode then, and listened to Joey, the unlikely poster boy for positive male emotional expression.
Welcome to the club Chandler. Just try not to do it in public. No-one wants that.
Real Live Sitcom Moment:
There is no shame in crying at things that are sad, and hey, if you’re an actual baby you can cry everyday for sometimes no reason at all.
My bairns getting a lot braver and happier as she’s getting older, thankfully. Although she did completely lose her shit the other day.
I was doing the bedtime routine, and my wife used the opportunity for some pampering.
But, never one to fully switch off from motherhood, she came in to check on things. Cue baby crying, us confused as to why before eventually realising it was that my wife was wearing a dark mud face mask, sporting the sort of look that would get you a light entertainment slot in the fifties, or not hinder your chance of re-election in Canada.
Yep, my wife’s skincare products looked a little less than PC, and our baby was absolutely not having it.
God the younger generation are so woke now, aren’t they?