Torn To Ribbons
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4.4 - “The One Where I Watch The One With The Ballroom Dancing”

3/11/2018

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My plans to be less selfish seem to have stalled. I’ve spent the last hour trying to understand the Wikipedia™ article on “Virtual International Authority Files”.

My wife is not amused.

But neither, it’s fair to say, am I. It’s a pretty dry read.

I’m in good company though:

Rachel is in trouble with Monica and Mr Treeger for selfishly clogging up the trash chute.

And Phoebe is thinking of herself so much she bites the arse of a sexy massage client!

Given my previous concerns about Joey, it’s a big surprise Phoebe is the first to lose her job for sexual harassment.

“The One Where I Feel Like Dancing”

Phoebe joining the wrong side of the #MeToo movement not with-standing, the characters emasculation produces the majority of the jokes this week.

Chandler (and later Ross) are castigated for their inability to quit their gym subscription. I’ve managed to avoid this trap by never getting one. “Just say no” proving a powerful tool in maintaining my current shape (flabby Mr Burns body).

“Just saying no” is also helping with the non-drinking. I’ve found refusing any opportunity immediately has stopped it being a constant battle of on-again, off-again. I only need to get a handle on my Smartphone abuse now. It’s increasingly irritating Janice. Nowadays the only thing harder than cancelling your gym membership is quitting Facebook™.

It’s good to have Mr Treeger back in my life. He was last seen almost two years ago awkwardly hitting on Rachel at New Years. Being able to check up on myself from two years ago is pretty weird. And a little annoying to find I’m still going through facial hair trouble.

I should probably resist the temptation to compare my life now to my life then, as well as to Friends™. It would be a step down the rabbit hole too far. But my difficulty in growing a decent beard does at least fit with the characters masculinity crisis.

It’s most apparent in all the jokes that are essentially “isn’t dancing gay LOL”, as Joey is press-ganged into dancing with Mr Treeger to save Rachel and Monica’s apartment.
It's a sweet scene but I have to say the jokes are a little tiresome.

Only last night we were out dancing for Joey Number 1’s birthday. No drinking doesn’t mean no fun! The bar even had loads of Foosball tables. Maybe it’s where Chandler and Joeys ended up?

Me Number 1 and I talked about how ridiculous it was feeling self-conscious about dancing when we were students. Now we take every opportunity with gleeful abandon, weddings, birthdays, funerals. (OK, maybe not the last one).

It does help there’s a lot less pressure to impress once you’ve already tied down a mate.

Real Live Sitcom Moment:

Ever since Janice and her sister recreated the Friends™ episode where they wear wedding dresses I’ve wanted to do my own Friends™ recreation.

Last weekend we finally got the chance round her parents house. My brothers-in-law and I were getting a little bored, until someone suggested dressing up.

Yep, much to Janice’s horror, we took it turns to try on her dress.

Why should Janice and her sister have all the Friends™ fun?
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