I’m going to wait for my other sister to give birth before asking if she knows anything about our (slightly less) mysterious half-brother.
It’s best not to give someone just months away from giving birth a big shock.
I’m quite looking forward to being an uncle now. And looking forward to seeing how Phoebe not spending any time with her nephew/niece compares to me doing the same.
In the mean time, I’m enjoying calling my sister fat as much as possible without fear of repercussions.
I’m even coming round to the idea of having kids myself. I could do with an excuse to leave parties early.
“The One Without the Strip Club”
SPEAKING OF PARENTS. Joey’s dad’s finally back! Though mentioned only… once again, strangely, in an episode with someone walking in on another person in the shower.
Joey’s moving up in the world, this time it’s REAL LIFE Charlton Heston walking in on him! Let’s hope he doesn’t fall to his knees at the sight of Joey’s “Statue of Liberty”.
Lovesick Chandler’s finding it hard to get some privacy too, with the Chick and Duck following him to the loo. Our cat is obsessed with the same. Running up the stairs to follow us every single time we go to the toilet.
I really have no idea what he gets out of watching us wee. Why does he do it? I dunno, maybe he’s an R Kelly fan.
Chandler’s coping with the loss of Kathy by staying in his chair for two days. Lucky bugger. I’ve been trying to do that ever since we got the internet sorted, along with a new TV. I almost made it today! And then I had to take an Amazon™ delivery to my wife’s work. If only there was some way of Amazon™ delivering it direct to her…
It does mean I’m able to watch the show on Netflix™ finally. Goodbye DVDs. Oh, oh, what’s that Netflix™? Skip the intro? NEVER.
Her efforts to date him are thwarted again, before Ross kindly steps in to take her boss’s niece off her hands. (Some English chick called Emily). God I’m glad I’m not single. Sometimes I forget what a nightmare even FINDING a date was. And even then you’ve got to make small talk with someone you don’t know for hours, only for it all to fall through and you end up like Chandler. Wearing pajama bottoms under your trousers, in case any little thing goes wrong on the road to recovery.
But the women are on hand to help him! They take him to a strip club and ultimately get him back in the mood for dating by talking about which strippers they’d sleep with:
Chandler: “Stop it! You’re killing me! I think I just moved on to Phase Four!”
Phoebe: “Oh! What is that? What is that?”
Chandler: “Where I don’t want to have a relationship ever! I just want to have sex with strippers and my friends!!”
He says, gesturing at Monica. Dream on, Chandler.
Real Live Sitcom Moment:
To this day I’ve never been to a strip club. Well, not properly.
Back at university I went once. My Real Live Friend and I went on a bender, which I believe ended with me being so drunk my hand let go of the full pint I was holding, and it was time for bed…
But before that, my friend, who, it’s fair to say, was a little sex obsessed, spent the entire evening joking about going to a strip club. Yep, he was a regular Joey.
Walking through Soho to the next pub an enchantress appeared offering us just that. With the promise of FREE ENTRY. Never one to look a gift horse in the boobies, my mate insisted we went in.
So we stumbled down these dodgy stairs, before each buying the most expensive pint ever and sitting down. After two minutes conversation with a hostess Joey Number 3 began to freak out and decided to leave.
This left me with a dilemma as I was now the proud owner of the world’s two most expensive pints.
I think I managed about two thirds of one before deciding it would probably be a good idea to go find Joey. Instead of downing two pints by myself in the dodgiest strip bar in Soho.